The Review Process
A High Court Judge is currently reviewing how we conduct rape cases in Northern Ireland following the high profile trial involving two rugby players earlier this year. Sir John Gillen is hearing evidence from a wide range of people. Today an Omagh woman who was raped told him her story. Sabrina Barton from Omagh is highly critical of how the trial involving her attacker was conducted. She's waived her right to anonymity and has been telling me what she said at today's meeting.
Posted by BBC Newsline on Thursday, August 30, 2018
Change is Coming…
The changing landscape of Autumn is my favourite time of year. Gone are the worries over my summer body and it is with relief that the jumpers and jeans are resurrected from the back of my closet. Now, I have weather-permission to hide behind my warm coats, and if I am honest, I have been feeling pretty exposed over the last few months. It is nothing I haven’t felt before and this time, it is in a good way. I have been deeply humbled by the positive response to The Terrible Tuesday and to speaking to the media. The decision to publish the book under a cover name was taken for legal reasons, and gave me a degree of separation from it all, but it felt good to finally own up and say, “Yes, it is my story”.
All too often, we hide our darkest experiences from everyone, including ourselves, and I am guilty of this too. I spent the first couple of years of my recovery desperately trying to find a way around it, without actually accepting the events of The Terrible Tuesday and their impact on my life, but no-one can apologise for the length of time it takes them to heal or the road they take that leads to recovery.
Over the years, I found it difficult to work through my feelings from the legal and trial process. I am eternally grateful for the work that went into my case from the Police team and other professionals involved and I should have been overjoyed at the verdict, but the process left me with a sour taste in my mouth and a deep seated anger at the injustice of my treatment from the defence team. It is only now, twelve years later, that I got the opportunity to express those feelings by taking part in the Review Process.
The Independent Review into Sexual Offences in Northern Ireland is the first stepping stone that will lead to change in practice for victims of sexual assault and I feel privileged to have taken part in it. The review team were sensitive and kind and assured me that I am not alone in my feelings of anger, frustration and helplessness at the process we must endure in an attempt to seek justice for the crimes committed against us.
I have no hesitation in encouraging you to come forward and speak to the review team: you can e mail them at [email protected] and speak anonymously, if you wish. The review process has given me a platform to express my feelings and a sense of liberty, at having done so. I look forward to reading the recommendations from this review, and watching their implementation in practice, in the hope that the road ahead, is more bearable, for those coming after me.
Thank-you all kindly, for your lovely messages of support and encouragement, you have allowed me to feel proud of myself and my journey so far.
Best Wishes for a Super Tuesday Folks….
Talking with Tara Mills
'They ask you questions about your contraceptive habits, about what you were wearing' – Sabrina Barton on the trauma of a rape trial.You can see the full interview with Tara Mills on BBC Newsline
Posted by BBC News NI on Wednesday, June 27, 2018
Long May It Last…
It was with nervous excitement that I opened the parcel with my author copy of The Terrible Tuesday inside it. Finally.. after ten years of working on the manuscript, to hold it in my hands as a book was overwhelming. I was struggling not to cry in front of the children and my son asked me why I was upset. “These are happy tears” I said, “I am so happy I can’t help it!” and we were all smiling and laughing.
“So you are an author?” He said and I said, “Yes, I guess so, isn’t that great?” “It is, very good mummy, now what are we having for dinner?” he said and I laughed out loud and that was the moment over. I was relieved not to have to answer any awkward questions about the subject matter of the book but I didn’t get away as lightly as that.
The next morning on the way to school my six year old daughter asked me what the book was about and I said “It’s about a really bad day I had once when I lived in London before you were born” There was a contemplative silence in the car before she said “Did it rain all day mum? Was it so awful that you couldn’t get outside? That must have been terrible” and I said “It did pet, it lashed from the heavens all day long” and it was one of those moments that warmed my heart. The worst day she can imagine is being unable to go outside to play with the dogs or see her rabbit or steal sweets from the jar and eat them in her secret hut.
I smile to myself on the way home. My clever daughter with her care free attitude and her innocent way of looking at the world has reminded me that If I change the way I look at things I will change what I see. The worst thing that might happen today, is that it might rain.
I hope it lasts for a long time to come..
The Terrible Tuesday.. available now at alanacorry.com